Diary of A Sane Man

Note: The Template for this blog FUBAR’d some of the pictures; they don’t look this poor in real life.

A few weekends ago a new addition to the family entered the house. It is a wellspring of joy and fulfillment, and brought Val and I even closer together. The cats don’t know what to make of it, it probably keeps the neighbors up and we had to really shift things around in the apartment to give it a place of its own.

What? A baby? Screw that! We’re talking about a Nintendo Wii! We got the last one at the store after being laughed at at five other stores. The Wii comes with the sweet sports game, but golfing and bowling with the controller gets old fast. In order to combat such a thing from ever happening, we nabbed Super Paper Mario and The Godfather: Black Hand Edition. Here’s the kicker - I already own The Godfather on the PS2. Why would I waste one of my only Wii purchases on a game I already own? Har har. Stand back, heathen, and be enlightened!

What follows is a list of the features the Nintendo Wii version has over the PS2 version. Perhaps you’ll understand the edge these give over the older version that I already own and you’ll understand why I would upgrade. Perhaps you’ll understand that the PS2 version was like regular radio and the Wii version is like satellite radio… a little bit more expensive, but worlds beyond what you had to made do with. This list is more for people who have already played the PS2 version since its a comparative blog rather than a real review, but even if you haven’t played the older version you might still learn something.

1. The Wii Controller: When I purchased the game I was afraid that the game was going to be just another port, one that didn’t utilize the abilities of the Wii. I was way wrong. This game uses the Wii remote to its fullest potential. When you beat the crap out of people, strangle people, garrote ‘em or toss ‘em out of a window, you use the Wii “nunchuck” in an appropriate fashion that mimics the move. Aiming the gun is much easier too. In both versions you can shoot people in certain areas of their bodies to get a certain response. For example, shooting a person in the arm might get their to drop their gun, while shooting them in the head is an instant kill. The PS2 controller was a little sketchy when it came to performing precise aiming like this, but the Wii-mote is spot on.

2. There’s More To The City: The original game felt rushed out the door in a lot of ways and the city suffered in that regard. The PS2 version had every single type of store stuck with the same exact layout; every butchers shop was the same interior, every bar was the same interior, every warehouse was the same interior, etc.. It felt cheap. The Wii version doesn’t have that problem. Each building is unique inside and it makes a big difference. Hell, there’s even outdoor markets scattered around the city (this little detail made it seem more like the time period it’s supposed to be). Another thing that bothered me in the PS2 version was that each crime family lived in a perfect clone of the Corleone Family compound. The Wii version fixed that glaring “cheat”. Now the families live in unique compounds with their own style of architecture and layouts. Now storming a compound is a helluva lot more fun since you don’t automatically know the layout.

   And there’s some rooftop action stuff. No, really. Throwing a mobster to a 40-story death is rather satisfying. Hell, in one mission you can go outside and see his body splattered on a car that was passing by. Mmmm.

   

3. There’s New Skill-Trees: Instead of one skill tree there’s now two, basically giving you two “character classes” (Enforcer and Operator) with the ability to cross-train. Unlike the PS2 version there’s also abilities to unlock in each of the two “classes”. After putting 15 skill points into a class and then 30 skill points you unlock a class ability. For example, the Enforcer gets unlimited ammunition after you place 30 skill points in the class. I thought these abilities were nice incentives to focus in one of the careers over the other. The new skills are pretty sweet too: they’re more specialized at each dot and there’s new things to get that the PS2 version didn’t have. I wish I hadn’t scattered my skill points between the two careers though… I’ll never get to the level 30 ability in either at this rate. Meh, there’s always next time.

   

4. New Game Play (esp. Favors): There’s a lot of new game play on the Wii. Some of them are new Hit Contracts and these new ones have more style and story to them than the originals; they’re also a bit more complicated. Then there’s Favors. Certain events unlock Favor Missions, little side quests that people need done. Sometimes you can’t muscle into a business without doing a Favor for the owner (usually to prove that you can protect them, since that’s what you’re “selling”: protection). I’ve also witnessed a few scripted events that I hadn’t seen in the PS2 version, but since they’re meant to be fun little surprises I’ll keep my mouth shut.

5. More Things to Break: There’s a few new cars and civilian skins, some neighborhood specific, to add some flavor to the city. I see them as new things to break with your fist or shoot with your Street Sweeper shotgun. There’s also some more breakables in buildings too.

6. Weather: Finally, some weather. If I remember correctly, it didn’t rain or storm in the PS2 version. I might be wrong as I haven’t played the PS2 version since getting the Wii version.

7. Henchmen: You’re no longer a lone wolf in the Black Hand Edition. Now you feel like a member of a criminal organization instead of some solo street thug that occasionally meets up with other people. You have two options for backup in this game and both have their uses: Crew and Hit Squads. You can go to certain places in the neighborhoods, sometimes a bar, sometimes a warehouse, whatever, and hire some henchmen to come travel with you. This type of hireling can shoot out of car windows (you alternate which side by hitting the + or - buttons on the Wii-mote) which is really nice on some missions (and a Bonus on one Hit Contract). As you get more and more powerful throughout the game you can hire better and better henchmen like this. The more powerful ones can really help in a fight.

   

   The second type involves a meter at the top of the screen that slowly fills up. When it is full you can choose to call in some real muscle - you whistle and wave and a mean Corleone Hit Squad shows up and sticks with you until they’re dead or you dismiss them. The Hit Squad meter fills slowly so I use it sparingly, but the level 30 Ability for the Operator doubles the speed. The Operator also has some skills that make your Crew

8. Cleaned Up Graphics: The game just looks better. Building interiors look less generic/blocky and more realistic and flavorful. The city has more

9. It’s On The Wii: Niiiiiice.

   
   

The game isn’t perfect though. I’ve run into some Draw Distance problems but the PS2 version had them too. I can’t tell which has them worse. The Wii fluctuates: sometimes the Draw Distance isn’t bad and then other times it is really noticeable. There’s also a severe lack of lighting effects in the game, but I suppose that was a sacrafice made for having such a huge city with NO load times. Still, those are my only real beefs with the Wii Godfather game. I recommend it to anyone that has a Wii and is old enough to play M-rated games, even if you already own it on the PS2. Actually, I recommend it especially if you have the PS2 version, and you’ll fully appreciate the changes to the game then. The Godfather on the PS2 isn’t a finished game. I’d even go so far as to say it is only half baked. The Wii version is the complete game - and it’s awesome.

-=Grim=-

I… I can’t stop. I borrowed The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess from my friend Kyle and I’m pretty sure it’s one of the best games I’ve ever played. Ever. And I’ve played a lot of video games (my first system was the Odyssey 2, but I was down with my homies Ataris before that), but man this one takes the cake. The Wii-mote is what makes it the experience that it is; sure the gameplay is friggin’ outstanding, but swinging my sword for real is always a bonus as far as immersion goes. The game is HUGE and there’s so much to do. The “meaningless” dungeon crawls made me feel like I was playing Hackmaster and the bug collecting reminded me of Animal Crossing - with death involved. Overlaying it all is a fantastic plot and beautiful graphics.

Whenever I need a break from Zelda I play The Godfather: Black Hand Edition on the Wii. Or Super Paper Mario. I have to steer clear of Wii Sports a lot of the time because of my nerve pain. That’s the only real strike against the Wii in my opinion: sometimes it hurts to play if you’re already in some form of pain. I’ve also been playing Hotel Dusk: Room 215 on my Nintendo DS. Thus far it’s been pretty awesome: nice graphics, great dialogue and a deep, mysterious plot. It plays out like a detective novel (you even hold the DS sideways like a paperback book) and uses the stylus for everything.

And last but not least, Resident Evil 4 for the GameCube rounds out the video games I’ve been playing. I hate that game. I mean, I love it… but I hate it. It scared the shit out of me quite a few times and ARGH! It reminds me a lot of the movie Dagon, only there’s no Deep Ones (I hope).

-=Grim=-

I saw this on MySpace today:

I think I’m all about it. My only beef is that I check the “About us” section on their website and it said this: “Avaaz.org was co-founded by Res Publica, a global civic advocacy group, and MoveOn.org, an online community that has pioneered internet advocacy in the United States.” Were you sitting next to me at the time you might have heard the sound of screeching tires emanating from my ears. I have mixed feelings about MoveOn.org. When they first started I was very much behind them. They talked a good line and seemed to actually practice what they preached. I’ve noticed that a lot of ultra-Liberals (I see that movement as nasty and ignorant as the ultra-Conservatives and every other hate group out there) I’ve met tend to be… well… really immature when it comes to politics. Whenever I’ve seen them in action they reminded me more of a twelve year old child throwing a shit fit than any sort of political reckoning. MoveOn.org started pulling the same crap. Yes, you *do* have to play dirty in politics, but when you’re playing dirty against those who control all media you *will* be painted as a bad guy, and thus your whole movement will have ended before it began. They seem to forget that many Americans believe what they see on television and react based on what they’re told on the news. MoveOn leaves a bad taste in my mouth. But that’s for a whole other post; I’m posting this about Avaaz.org.

I signed the petition since I believe in this ideal. It’s optimistic, but I’ve always believed that if people are going to fight it should be personal, not because someone told them it’s personal. I have no beef with the Middle East or pretty much anyone else that I’ve never met. I have beef with certain radical ideologies, but these ideologies thrive on hate and ignorance, so I doubt anyone would miss them. I mean seriously, how many Christians do you know that think Falwell and Robertson speak for them? How many Muslims do you know that think bin Laden speaks for them? As an atheist I can assure you that the more vile “atheists” don’t speak for me.

So yes, I signed the petition. I still have beef with MoveOn.org. But I’m tired of people that don’t represent anything the People stand for calling the shots. I’m reminded of a quote:

Princess Leia: “The more you tighten your grip, Tarkin, the more star systems will slip through your fingers…”

Werd.

-=Grim=-

Sometimes I lament the fact that I bought a Wii instead of an XBOX 360. It actually pains me that there will be a GTA game that I *wont* be able to play. I hate second guessing myself, but it’s what I do. [Le sigh] But every time I start to really think I made the wrong decision about it the Wii proves that I made the right decision.

The Wii is a great system. The games I own are a lot of fun and the controller is a work of art; it is so good, in fact, that I can’t bring myself to play my PS2 or Gamecube games because the controllers feel “wrong”. But where the Wii really shines is when you have company over and conversation is either winding down or needs some spicing up. Just last weekend my grandparents, sister, and parents came to town for my brother’s graduation from SUNY Albany (lucky git) with plans to go eat at some ritzy Italian joint afterwards. The problem was that the reservations to eat were at 8 or 8:30 (I forget which) and the graduation ended around 4:30 or something like that. Everyone came back to me and my girlfriend’s pad to kill time and wait for 8 to roll around, but it was a dreary day and everyone was tired and thus conversation was a bit strained.

Enter the Wii.

My grandfather is BIG into golfing. My father enjoys it but isn’t as hardcore about it. I knew I could get them playing if I just showed them golf on the Wii. “Hey guys, wanna see something cooooool?” I asked. They looked skeptical and bored at my inquiry. I asked if anyone wanted to play and they all said no. I told my grandfather he was playing with me and that was that. It was then that I thanks the Video Game God for the Wii. As my grandfather and I played golf the whole family got into it, hooting and clapping as he waved the Wii-mote around like golf-ninjas. We then moved on to bowling, but this time there was no shortage of volunteers. My family was all about the Wii. What was a room full of semi-bored, luckluster conversation had become a party. Seven people yelling, cheering, and laughing as four people bowled off against one another. It was great. Nintendo made a brilliant move with the Wii. If I tried showing them the XBOX 360 or the PS3 they would have yawned and been like, [deadpan] “Yea your games are nice. Um… back to adult talk.” But the Wii is first and foremost an entertainment system for all ages.

Forget the 360 or PS3. The Wii is awesome.

-=Grim=-

Starcraft 2 Opening Cinematic Trailer

Seriously.

-=Grim=-

And “Fuck” can be scary when it wants to be.

I was at the local Goodwill the other day because my girlfriend feared that a missing library book was donated by accident. She didn’t find it in there, but she did find a friggin’ treasure trove of books. She found her supernatural/bondage erotica and even a Wraith the Oblivion anthology and I found an AD&D book and a White Wolf book about Hell and souls trying to escape or arrive there. That sort of stuff. Some gamer geek definitely dropped stuff off the day before and this was his or her stuff. This person even dropped off REALLY old school TSR games still in their boxes (and a mint condition Risk). I didn’t nab any of the latter but I was tempted to. The video game section was abnormally stocked with games (usually they have shit Super NES game or Genesis games no one wants to play. Ever.).

A few months ago I played the demo version of a game called Condemned: Criminal Origins. Despite being a new game it ran pretty well on my computer and I chalked it up to being a game I wouldn’t mind owning one day. Sure as shit there it was in the Goodwill for $15. Val bought it for me for my birthday (from 2006, hehe); I guess she felt bad about forgetting to get me something… I dunno. Regardless, she bought me the game.

It takes a lot to scare me when it comes to video games. Silent Hill and Fatal Frame are the only games I can recall that really bugged me out, and Fatal Frame was the only one to get me to jump. There’s been other games that have mind-fucked me or freaked me out, but being scared? It’s rare. And dammit, I look for it since movies have been lackluster and boring lately. I *want* to be scared. It’s fun. So imagine my surprise when I discovered that Condemned: CO scared the living shit out of me. I’ll try not to blow anything for you, but I’ll warn you:

Spoiler Warning. Spoiler Warning.

Alright, now that that’s done with, let’s get to the game. Condemned markets itself as a criminal mystery type game. You’re a Federal Agent on the tail of a fucked up serial killer when you’re suddenly framed for the murder of two police officers. You go on the run while still trying to solve this case and hopefully clear your name. That’s the jist of the game.

Or so it seems.

It turns out that there’s two events going on behind the story: one is that something is decimating the bird population, some sort of virus or something, and the other is that violence is on the rise in the city. Vagrants, addicts and hoodlums are practically rioting in the shitty areas of the city and no one knows why. They don’t even know if the bird deaths and crime rates are connected. On top of this you have your story. Then it gets… weird. I have an innate fear (and love) of zombies. I dream about zombies often and they scare the shit out of me. I love it. And there’s zombies in this game (I won’t go into the story too much as I don’t want to ruin the plot). They’re horrible… pale, milky-eyes, moaning nasty things with violent tendencies. So this game is both a criminal mystery game and a horror game. On top of these “things”, these zombies, you have odd visions of spectral entities and other horrible beings. What I love about this game is that they don’t over do it with the enemies. You’re alone in a creepy place more than you fight.

Speaking of fighting, the AI is awesome. The enemies are insane so they’re not overly cautious or anything, but they still use tactics. I’ve seen them withdraw to fight later on, grab weapons or re-arm themselves after I disarmed them, flank me, even fight one another… the list goes on. But the enemy isn’t retarded. The fighting is a lot of fun as well. You have to parry incoming attacks, take swings yourself, kick and apply finishing moves at times. Many things laying around can be used as weapons (by you and the baddies), ranging from pipes and 2×4 boards to shotguns and pistols. The guns always have little ammo, but they can be very useful at times. It bugged me out the first time one of the psychotic addicts ran for the same gun I was running for, beat me to it and shot me point blank in the face. Yes, I had to Quick-Load. One weapon you always have on you is a taser and that friggin’ thing saves your ass a lot. That same guy that ran for the gun did it again the second time around, but this time I tasered him, took the shotgun off his hands while he was stunned, and returned the favor of the face-shot. Yes, combat is fun in this game.

I suggest turning off the cross hairs, by the way. It makes shooting a little harder and more realistic and less HUD adds to the atmosphere, where the cross hairs tend to distract from them and remind you you’re playing a video game.

The game itself is awesome looking. The boards are very linear, but for some reason you just can’t care: the game is too busy creeping you out. The settings for each board are perfect for creep factor (mostly abandoned buildings where crimes went down) and the graphics really pull the details out. The textures are nicely done (down to the friggin’ paintbrush strokes in paintings on the wall). The sounds enhance the graphics, working with them to create an atmosphere that scares the shit out of you. This game was meant to be played in the dark. Anything less and you lose the vibe. Screams echo through buildings, rats scuttle and the bad-guys fuck with your head before attacking. Most of the light you have to work with comes from your flashlight which adds to the mood and creep-factor.

I should also note that your character has “visions” like a psychic. They use this to add creep factor to the game. You see some scary shit (the mannequins in the abandoned department store scared the hell out of me).

My beef with the game (there’s always beef with something)?

(1)The “CSI” Tools: Throughout the game you’re trying to solve a serial killer case, so you’re often collecting evidence with various CSI tools. I absolutely love this part of the game. But here’s the problem with it: they tell you when to use it. It would have been better if you could use your tools whenever you wanted to and they didn’t tell you when clues might be nearby.

(2)Linear Boards: Sometimes you notice that the boards are linear, but usually you don’t care. Once in a while, though, you can’t help but notice and wish the game wasn’t like this.

(3)Physics Engine: Once in a while the physics engine is retarded. I’ve seen a body just slowly slide across a flat floor for no reason. It just kept going. It was weird.

Overall this game rocked my house. No, really. IGN rated it at “Great” and I agree. All games have their faults and this game is no exception, but you hardly notice them. This game is all atmosphere and plot. It’s one of the better games I’ve played in a while and I can’t stress enough how much I’m enjoying Condemned. Best $15 Val and I have ever spent. It’s fuckin’ creepy man. Really, really creepy.

*shudder*

-=Grim=-

Yo, this shit is awesome. No really. If Lord of the Rings was actually a D&D campaign this is what it’d play out like. Some parts cracked me up.

-=Grim=-

For the past two weeks I’ve been playing my new addiction: Yakuza for the Playstation 2.

People. If you like those free-roaming, mature-rated, ass-kicking games like Scarface, The Godfather, Grand Theft Auto, or The Warriors, you’ll like this game. The Japanese setting is a breath of fresh air too. In this genre it’s usually the seedy underside of America that we see as the setting (even if the city is fictional like San Andreas or Vice City). The Yakuza are also quite different in form and function than the Mafia, American street gangs or American drug dealers, so things are run a bit differently. In other words, it’s a nice break for the genre to be playing an ex-Yakuza bad-ass in Tokyo.

I’ll start with the bad shit: Yakuza, much like any other game, has it’s flaws. Four really stood out for me.

(1) The background “murmur”: There seems to be three distinct levels of “city noise” in the game. The first is the people directly around you that you hear talking. The second is the indistinct noises of the area you’re in (more on this in a second). The third is the distant murmur of the entire city, the remote babble of thousands of voices talking and yelling. And for fuck’s sake it’s the most annoying loop you’ll ever hear in one of these games! No, really. It’s like a six-second loop that sounds more like a Silent Hill creature than a city murmur. Thankfully, you eventually learn to tune it out.

(2) The region “murmur”: Every city block has it’s own sounds of people talking and crying out. It was a cool idea. The execution sucked. Each block has only a few clips of sound and they repeat in the most annoying way. You’ll hear the same two or three cries/calls repeated over and over and over and over ad nauseum until you leave the block just to get away from them. GNARGH!

(3) The third complaint is iffy. Sometimes I like this feature, sometimes it pisses me off. Imagine GTA with random encounters in the city and you have this feature. At random times in the city you’ll be accosted by enemy Yakuza, gang-members, pissed off citizens, gangbusters, and common thugs who will try to pick a fight with you. They’re really hard to evade and once they get close enough to “talk” to you (read: talk shit) you won’t be able to avoid combat. This feature is really nice when you’re out looking to get XP so you can pump your skills up, but it’s also really annoying when all you want to do is get from Point A to Point B without hassle, but every other block someone jumps you.

(4) Load times. Enough said.

Now for the good, and trust me, there’s way more good than bad and it outweighs any complaints I have about the game:

(A) The graphics are pretty sweet in my opinion. They’re what you’d expect from the more recent 2006/2007 PS2 games. Considering the size of the game and all of the action on screen I was expecting more lag than I got. Yakuza’s Tokyo is alive with people, more so than I’ve seen in other free-roam games like this. It really looks like a living, breathing city at times. Sometimes I get lag because of this, but usually the game runs smooth. The fight scenes are smooth as well. They’re smoother than The Warriors and have more moves than The Godfather, and much more exciting than anything GTA has thrown at me.

(B) The plot and cinematics are epic. I’ve felt like a bad-ass in other games like this, but not like Yakuza. There were times I was yelling at the television or seething at wrongs committed against out protagonist in the game. When he brings the beat-down you *want* to bring the beat-down. You *want* to do the things he does. You really feel for the characters (both Kiryu Kazuma, the protagonist, and his allies throughout), especially since this is one of the few games like this where the protagonist is honorable, decent, and… well… good? I didn’t beat the game yet, but I’m on the last chapter. Unless they really drop the ball at the end, this will be one of the better plots I’ve seen in the free-roam/criminal genre. It’s good. And it’s played out like an epic, modern day martial arts movie.

(C) The fighting is fun. Even the random encounters. The more XP you pump into certain skills the more fun the fighting gets as you unlock new moves (either directly from the XP boost or through a mentor you meet later in the game). Of course to get this XP you need to fight, so it’s a never-ending cycle of ass0kicking and skill-raising (not that I’m complaining much). The ass-kicking never stops in the game and damn it feels good to beat on the baddies. Between the plot build-ups and the character developments, laying the smack down has never felt better. Early in the game the moves you can do are very limited, but as the game progresses you get more and more creative.

Did I mention the weapons? Every fight you get into has things nearby that you can pick up and use as a weapon. This ranges from tables and chairs, to golf clubs and baseball bats, to street cones and stun guns. I personally like using the bicycles as weapons, especially for finishing moves. Mmmm.

(D) It’s a long game. I only paid $24 for the game and so far I’ve been playing for 31 hours and I’m still not finished. Besides the main storyline, there’s dozens of side-quests and odd missions, the aforementioned random street-fights and arcade games/gambling to partake in. Sure, you might be able to beat the game much quicker, but part of the fun is immersing yourself in the city. I spent some of those 31 hours gambling at casinos, fighting in illegal boxing rings, messing around in arcades, purposely looking for random fights to boost my XP (and thus stats) and going on dates with hookers hostesses. It’s a big game and for $24 I wound up paying something like $0.70 per hour of game time. Or something. I dunno, I suck at math.

All in all I’m getting a kick out of the game. The plot is intense and as a result I find myself longing to kick the crap out of the villains and push the plot forward to the next “level”. It really plays out like an action-packed martial arts movie. Despite some annoying flaws it’s a fine game and worth picking up used. Does it have replay value? Sure. I definitely plan on playing through it again. Not immediately, but I will.

And good news: Yakuza 2 is on it’s way.

-=Grim=-

I have no control over them really. One of them reads (or read) something about proving Creationism is true and what not. Perhaps it missed the target audience by a few miles? I dunno. On the flipside, the ads wouldn’t score any hits if they were doing the opposite. I can see them now:

Think Creationism is False? Prove Evolution is true. Read a fuckin’ book, loser.

Hrmm, I dunno if it’d score any hits. People surf the web so they can pretend to know everything by using their Google-Fu. Who needs books?

-=Grim=-

Anyone? Bueller? Anyone?

Now, private military contractors aren’t anything unknown to people that pay attention to civil liberties and potential abuses, but do I need to spell out how bad things can get with shit like this and JCS Conplan 37-J in effect? They’re above our laws and lawmen. And they answer to the real puppeteers.

Meh, sometimes I think the Liberals are right. More later.

-=Grim=-